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Institute for Jedi Realist Studies - Anger


The Jedi does not let anger get in the way or aid in your decisions.  As the code says, there is no emotion; there is peace.  As has been discussed many times by many people about that line of the code in relation to the Jedi is does not mean we can’t or don’t feel emotion.  We just don’t let it guide us or interfere with our decisions and choices.  Anger is a powerful emotion especially over some individuals and can be the easiest to let get out of hand.  It is very easy to let your anger get a hold of your actions and decisions.  For someone who has a really temper problem/anger issues, and etc., really look at your life.  When you have been in the heat of the moment when your blood is flowing and you are angry does anything productive ever get accomplished.  Sometimes I’m sure the answer is yes but in those cases I can guarantee that in the process you have not given people the best look at who you are as a person.  Also you have probably said some things you didn’t mean.  How many times have you said something you didn’t mean when you were happy or at peace with yourself as compared to being angry and in the heat of the moment.  I’m sure it would be many more times when you are angry.  What is the sense of exploding with your anger when nothing ever gets accomplished?  The answer would be that it’s much easier just to let your anger take you over.  It’s so difficult to tone it down and express yourself in a cool calm manner. 

Being a teacher, on occasion I will end up crossing paths with a parent who is really ticked off at me over something I did.  They will come in flaming mad and just yelling and doing all the other lovely things that parents can do.  I have seen teachers go right back at them in the same manner and nothing gets accomplished and the parent ends up leaving even angrier when they came in and it usually end up with an administration meeting which is never a good thing.  What I do and the person I student taught with would do is never raise your voice.  Keep your voice, choice of words, and demeanor calm and cool no matter how irate the parent is getting.  Their goal is to get you going so you get a little more angry then them, then they get more then you and so on.  If you remain calm and cool in a situation with someone who is going bonkers they will either cool down themselves or else end up storming out but coming to realize later how foolish and stupid they acted and will come back to apologize and finally talk out the issue with you.

Now this doesn’t mean as Jedi we can’t get angry but for example with me.  You would never know I am angry by looking at me or hearing me when I am.  When something gets me to that point which is rare you would never know and it has no influence on my words or actions.  It is under complete control.  When dealing with people I find when they do something that angers you it is not really anger I am feeling but disappointment.  I never tell anyone I am angry with them.  I find this also works great with kids.  I tell them I am disappointed with them.  People take this much more to heart then they do when you tell them you are mad at what they did or didn’t do.  It will also show people you do not need to have anger when something bad was done or said.  In this day and age as is being talked about in another thread, we need to teach people how to act and treat others by example.  You can talk all you want about controlling your anger and doing everything I talked about but if you can’t show it by example it is completely worthless.  

If you are having problems with anger take a hard look at yourself.  What causes you to get angry?  Talk to others to find out how they overcame this.  Don’t talk to people who never had anger issues.  Talk to people who had the anger issues as they will have much more life experience with how to work through your anger and get it under control.  When I have a problem on trumpet I don’t go talk to people who can just pick up the trumpet and have no problems.  I find the people who went through hell to be as good as they are because they know from experience what it takes and what needs to be done to get through something.  Look around you and learn from those who have worked hard in life but look even harder at the people who have fallen and then recovered to go on and do great things.  Those are the people to learn from in life.