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Jax
I’m working on writing a short article on resilience since I’ve had to cultivate quite a bit of it in my life. I was wondering about your experiences. How do you cultivate resilience in your life? What sabotages these efforts? I have my own ideas but there’s so much collective wisdom here that I may be missing something.
Kol Drake
One can consider this book (and there is an accompanying CD if you buy the set)…
Mental Resilience: The Power of Clarity: How to Develop the Focus of a Warrior and the Peace of a Monk
by Kamal SarmaBasically, a book on ‘the theory and practice of meditation’… has a good ‘how to meditate’ bit for those who need a bit of help ‘getting it’.
:yoda
Resilient people know how to stay calm and avoid letting their emotions run over them. They know how to revive their mind rather than just the body. Research suggests that mindfulness exercise and mediation is the best way to reduce stress. Hence why meditation is stressed highly here and in other ‘contemplative’ disciplines…. it’s GOOD for ya!
Thanks Kol, but I’m more looking for people’s individual, personal experiences. That sounds like an interesting book though.
Magdelene Nashira
Does sound like an interesting book and I noted the name of the book and author so I can look for it. As for how I deal with it, that remains a question because I think it is a point where I’m blocked at this point and something I need to seek information and experience for before I can really know what to suggest.
Yet you have overcome many challenges already in your life. Why are you still alive, still moving forward and trying to do more with your life when you could have simply gave up?
A great question, Jax, and I can’t tell you how much I thank you for asking it. I think that hits the nail right on the head for me. I keep going because I know I have to. I know I have to because I know that there is no turning back. There is no giving up. Perhaps the “do or do not, there is no try” is a bigger part of me than I thought. It’s become subconscious to me and in another post on this same day I was kind of questioning it. But yes, I can see from your question, that yes this is still deeply engrained as my creed. Thank you, Jax! :meditate
No problem. Resilience has so much to do with our core beliefs, the ones that may have been subconsciously formed in childhood that it takes some effort to root them out. Mindset is absolutely key. Awareness as well. And taming that inner voice so you aren’t sabotaging your progress so you can keep pushing and not give up.
Jedi_Phoenix
I think resilience is a very lacking characteristic for me. I do have my own set core beliefs as discussed before, but I also have trouble sticking to them. I’ve very extroverted, so I love talking with others and also sometimes I try to be a people pleaser. So instead of being resilient and sticking to my guns so to speak, I say what I don’t want to do, for the other person. Well at least I used to do that. About a week ago, that all changed. I kinda burnt out and just said no to everything. I got all my shifts covered at work, wasn’t driving anywhere, and just completely shut out. I’ve slowly built back up my foundation. I’m not always the yes person anymore. I set my boundaries with my owner so I’m not overworked. I also set my boundaries with my significant other. Now comes the hardest part: setting those boundaries with myself so that I can have the resilience with others. But that takes time, practice and patience.
Ok done rambling
Rocky Mountain Jedi
Strangely enough, I draw on external reserves to fill my resilience tank, so to speak. When I reflect on it, I feel that I am the most resilient when I am giving to others… or most often helping others in my life. There have been many instances though where my ability to “bounce back” has come from within. I believe that when I am working on something I see as a positive, or a good, then I seem to be able to find resilience. With things that are not so good, or really have no benefit for others or myself I have found that I fall down on occasion, just like in the TV ad, without the little speaker that I can yell into (“HELP! I have fallen, and I can’t get up!)
This pattern doesn’t bother me though; I know on one or two occasions it has been a good way for me to judge if what I am doing “feels right,” if that makes sense to anyone.
May the Force be with you… always. :vader
That’s interesting and an example of one teaching of spiritual masters – if you want something in your life, give it to another. If you need to be lifted up, lift someone else up and it will lift you up as well.
You know, I too have that pattern where things just don’t work well if it’s not supposed to be something I am doing. It is a very helpful gauge, though it can be tricky at times too. I’m constantly wondering if I’m self sabotaging or if I’m just getting a message that something isn’t right for me. You know, realizing that your intuition works that way helps you be more resilient too. Our attitude is really key in being resilient.
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