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    So I had the awesome ability to do both Star Wars Celebration as well as a little bit of Disney (it was in Orlando after all). There were lots of awesome things about going (saw & did lots of awesome things, met lots of great people) for sure, but this post isn’t about that. One of the really tough things during the week-long trip, oddly enough, was keeping it Jedi. By that I mean maintaining the regular amounts of patience, good will, empathy, etc. I found myself getting snippy with people, being impatient, and a bit whiny at times. I argued about silly things. I had an anxiety attack the last day. And in general I wasn’t able to just soldier on as I’d planned (more breaks, didn’t want to do as many activities as I’d wanted). It didn’t feel good, and I felt guilty when I had moments of clarity in between.

    It wasn’t until afterwards that I realized I had basically hit a low point in terms of self care. I got mildly sick during the trip, and the long packed (and hot) days meant my energy never got fully recharged even when I tried to sleep enough (plus the sick led to pretty crappy quality sleep. Travel planning is also always a bit stressful for me. And I think I remembered to meditate maybe 3 times. So yes, by the end of the trip I was fairly fried.

    All of this is not to say that I was justified in my cranky behavior. But it’s a great reminder of why self care is important, and why I do what I do in terms of daily/weekly self care. By keeping my self running as smoothly as possible, I’m able to be the best version of myself – both for myself & for everyone else. A depleted version of myself is simply not able to do the same level of good in the world.

    So back home and actually taking care of myself.

    Kol Drake

    And how much of this ‘being less than Jedi daily’ was you ‘failing to be fully Jedi’ and how much of it was not being aware that you are in a theme park surrounded by thousands of ‘not Jedi’ people… who are smiling, laughing, internally (and some externally) bitching about the heat, the humidity, the long lines for rides, the cost of food & drinks, the tickets and just about every other ‘bitch’ one can think of. All that times several thousand.

    It’s ain’t easy being a cool, calm Jedi all the time.
    Even that Mace WIndu got a bit snippy in counsel meetings. :P

    Sorry you got sickly.
    DO hope you bounce back with rest, hydrating, vitamin C and zinc!

    Hang in there.


    So more than a month ago, I had an entry started for the next writing assignment and felt really good about it. It was all about how the term “prowess” end up having some meaning connections to the term kung fu in terms of the hard work one puts in. I was identifying really hard with this at the same time as I was trying to put my martial arts class attendance back on track after getting sick.

    Well, life had an ego lesson for me as fatigue, illness, and poor mental health kicked me in the butt again.

    First I noticed my symptoms and my really crappy mood. Retrospectively I realized I was withdrawing from things that I previously wanted to do (a red flag I easily notice in everyone but myself). I did a lot of hard introspection and a lot of grounding work. I should have reached out for help, and would have probably gotten out of it faster had I done so. But instead I put my martial arts classes on hold while I worked on taking care of myself in all the other ways I’d been neglecting. I focused on sleeping. On nutrition. I meditated a lot, and for longer (I nearly had a 30 day streak). I also finally let myself acknowledge that I was undergoing an unexpected period of upheaval… made entirely of small-medium level things that had just snowballed into full stress mode. Along with health triggers that I was ignoring hard.

    I’m not back to 100% by a long shot. I had another health setback just recently, but I think I finally realized what was going on and what I need to do – which obviously & ironically involves taking myself to a doctor, for starters. Getting a mental health hookup now is also a good idea while I’m in better shape to do the legwork. I want to add martial arts back in, but when I do I will need to do so in a way where I won’t have extra guilt/emotional feedback when I can’t go for valid reasons (this had also become a problem).

    So, another rebuilding. Hopefully better this time.


    All the best for You and your healing and remember that You always can reach out to the community and asking for help or guidance or at least find an ear or maybe better said an eye for whatever You want to get rid of.
    So, take care and get better and healed and let the Force guide You along your individual Path! :meditate


    I hope you will have some time to write reviews on the books you’ve been studying. That’s an area that we need more recommendations for.


    I’m not great at book reports, and I know I’ve taken a long time with even the basic course material done. But if it doesn’t have to be very long I could write short blurbs on some of the things I’ve read. Let me know where it would be best for me to post things when I get a chance to work on that.

    Also, as I’ve fiiiiiinally made my way to the end of the basic Jedi Studies 101, how should I proceed? I know Connor had been the guidance counselor I’d spoken to a long time ago… is he the person I should speak to?


    To answer your questions, book reports should go here: Book Reviews.
    As for how to progress after Jedi Studies 101, this is completely up to You and You can pick whatever interests You most. For finally taking the Novice Exam, You need to work yourself through all the 101 courses. But, as said, there is no fixed order to them. Just be aware of that some of them might have a prerequest but that should be mentioned at the course download/description. For whichever next course You pick, I would recommend to contact the instructor and let them know that You are looking forward to take this course as not all of us might be able to regularly check the board.

    As for Guidance Counselor, Conner is not anylonger active in this position and Atticus has taken over his part at least for the PLP. So if You need some help there You can contact him or ask your question here in your PTD and someone of us will come back to it.

    Hope that helps. :meditate


    After a long hiatus, I am coming back and planning to resume my study here. However, I no longer connect with the former name of my journal, and am going to start a new journal page I can continue with. Apologies for the confusion but thanks for your patience!


    Kol Drake

    LIfe Happens…
    Time marches on…
    We grow and change…

    Name changes happen.
    It’s cool.

Viewing 9 posts - 41 through 49 (of 49 total)

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