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  • #139524
    Adana
    Participant

    Alright, I will post here for my classes as well as on my blog and anything else related to the Jedi Path.

    #152200
    Jedi_Phoenix
    Moderator

    Look forward to reading about your growth ;D

    #152207
    Adana
    Participant

    Thank you Phoenix  :D

    #152264
    Adana
    Participant

    Force Exercise:

    The Emotional Intuitive

    After taking the test it became apparent to me that I am indeed an Emotional Intuitive. I always suspected I was but never had confirmation until now.

    All of my life I was able to either sense or absorb the emotions and feelings of others. When I was much younger it was often difficult to deal with that and there were occasions when I would lash out toward others to rid myself of an overabundance of feelings. Sometimes, even to this day, I will cry for no reasons as it seems and now I know that I must have absorbed sensations from somewhere without having realized it.

    After a busy day at work or interacting with many people I seek solitude. Only that way can I center and balance myself again. If I do not have the opportunity to receive “Me Time” I can become irritable and moody and it becomes very difficult for me not to unleash what is bottled up inside me.

    Since I am a single mother with constant struggles one way or the other I began to keep many emotions inside and it almost killed me. Not in a literal sense but mentally. When I finally started to meditate again and took time out for myself my emotional state has gotten much better.

    I remember a time when I had just removed my ex-husband from our home and he would call me on occasion. After those phone calls I felt so much anger welling up within me that I was at a loss how to release such emotions. As a result I would go into the bathroom and let out a loud scream.

    Over the following years I started meditation exercises and found back to my earlier Jedi Path and Training. The darkness that had slowly begun to creep into me subsided and my emotional state improved.

    Today I can comprehend the emotions of others and my own much better. Only seldom to I have meltdowns due to emotional overloads now but I also have even become more sensible to sensing others.

    #152273
    Jedi_Phoenix
    Moderator

    Did you do that Lighthouse meditation? (I was an emotional intuitive too).  I agree, I’m a very social person, but for me because I am an emotional intuitive, I know I need my alone time as well.  I like how the staff puts it of making sure we schedule our ‘me time’ because we owe it to ourselves. 

    Something I struggle with.  One suggestion Jax gave me, which helps in the short term at least, is to pretend like those emotions are a loud volume noise or a channel station, and I can either turn down the volume or change the channel.  This at least gives me the oppurtunity to come back to my Jedi like mind, until I can get to that ‘me time’. 

    Keep up the good work :)

    #152288
    Adana
    Participant

    Thank you Phoenix. I did do the meditation and are working on a report on that as well. Hope to have it posted by tonight.

    #152452
    Adana
    Participant

    Meditation Exercise:

    I have always loved meditations with a theme as I call them and this one is becoming my favorite.

    Today was a day when I truly needed this. Not only have I dealt with the emotions of others but my own as well. So much has been placed upon me at this time that I feel overwhelmed and while not at a complete loss I feel as if walking through a labyrinth of emotional assessments:

    my mother’s constant need to instill feelings of guilt in me
    the feeling of helplessness because I can’t be  there for my parents in their time of need
    Frustration over other issues in my life

    I imagined myself near the ocean, my favorite place when I need to “escape”. As I moved through the different stages and depths of this exercise I not only felt much of what has been bothering me fall away but I could also experience smells, sounds and the sensation of sand between my toes. I would hear the ocean and the wind as I stood on top of the lightning tower. Spreading out my arms I greeted the elements and let them surround me, let the wind whisper in my ears and waves lap against the base of the tower, foam splashing and flying in the air. The sun caress my skin and send warmth throughout my body, making it easier to relax and let go of too many bottled up emotions.

    It has not been often lately that I found myself so deeply into the meditative state and when I finally came back it took me a while to realize where I was.

    I felt as if something had freed me from a weight that had rested inside me. I know that this is only the beginning and I have a long way to go to regain my balance as it once was. This exercise has brought me a small step closer to where I need to be. I know that in time the more intense meditations will also assist me in dealing not just with my own emotions but with those of others around me as well and it will be less difficult to absorb them. I will be able to shield myself better and be less affected.

    #152456
    inari
    Participant

    This is a great result from the meditation Adana, I’m glad it helped.

    #152560
    Adana
    Participant

    I know this took a while but Thank YOu Inari.

    Life is once again a roller coaster for me.

    My parents moved into an Assistant Living Facility yesterday and my mother has been very angry and upset with me for not living in Germany or wanting to move back there. Even if I decided to live there again I know I would not be happy or comfortable. I tried once, when my son was very little and I had a hard time readjusting – considering I grew up and lived there for the first 25 years of my life. Taking my son out of his current environment would not be beneficial either for him at this point and time. So I have tried to explain to my mother and while making the greatest attempt to understand her emotions I on the other hand will not accept any longer to be made the scape goat for some of my family’s harsh feelings toward me. I offered to come and help with the move, paperwork, and anything else that was necessary for the move but my mother actually, while at the same time blames me for having to sell the house, told me that it would be too stressful to have us there.My father is increasingly getting more confused and moves quickly to Alzheimer. It has been very upsetting to me as well and my training so far has kept me from falling apart at the seams as they say.

    My financial situation is in such disarray but there is hope on the horizon with a raise and finally salary status. Let’s hope it’s in time to avoid eviction from my apartment.

    Luckily I have  friends who help me cope in many ways and the inner strength to deal with it all even if it seems overwhelming at times.I went camping last weekend and being out there close to nature gave me an opportunity to refuel and I spent time to meditate and continue my energy training as well.

    I shall have my next journal entry for the Force Studies after this weekend posted. I still don’t have internet but I am getting closer to having everything restored. Thanks for all of your patience with me.

    #152563
    Jax
    Keymaster

    I know you’ve struggled with your family for a long time.  Sometimes there’s just nothing you can do to make it better.  I’m glad you’re choosing to live your life however and not compromising for them so everyone would be miserable.  Good luck and don’t worry about your classes.  You’re getting a solid lesson in application so it’s not like you aren’t training at all. ;-)  Get to it when you can. 

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