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Institute for Jedi Realist Studies - Staying Peaceful in an Angry World - Page 2 - Institute for Jedi Realist Studies

Staying Peaceful in an Angry World

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Jax replied the topic: Re:Staying Peaceful in an Angry World

In the Jedi Studies course you learn about expanding your energy. This is very helpful when learning to let people not affect you. For now, focus on the breathing and observing your self talk. Try what has already been provided. To give you more tips is unlikely to be helpful at the moment. But applying any one thing consistently will. :-) When you get to Jedi Studies, right after the Intro course, we will discuss it further.
#42866
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Brandel Valico replied the topic: Staying Peaceful in an Angry World

Accept that your not the focal point of the world, I am :rofl Seriously though.... We all to some degree or another create this secret world of illusion in which we are the star and everyone else and everything else that we interact with revolves around us. Consciously we know its not true but emotionally we all to often feel it is. When one person does something we dislike (say a brother/sister or spouse or parent or pet eats the danish we had plans on for breakfast) it upsets us and we work through it. Then the second person comes along and does something else (The neighbor doesn't wave or smile back when we smile a hello) We frown and shake our head and move on. All through out the day all of these small things keep happening and with each incident a small residual emotional charge gets left over. Slowly building and building until something medium size happens. (Say around Lunch a boss/teacher yells at us for something we didn't actually do.) We are know starting to think the world is out to get us. Quick flashes and thoughts like why does this stuff always happen to me.

This may take hours it may take days for some even months or years.

More often then not none of the issues are in anyway connected except by us. The person who ate the danish didn't do it to upset us, They just were hungry and it was there and they didn't realize we owned it ( :fight they should have. Oh wait we didn't actually own it?) That neighbor just found out their spouse is cheating on them and smiling at us is more then they can handle right now. That boss/teacher has a boss who is riding them hard and guess what they feel just as unappreciated and harried as we do. (It doesn't make what they did right of course)

All to often the issue isn't what we think it is. Its all the small issues building up because we don't take the time to really let them go. Even alot of those who think they do, have issues with this. They see connections in everything. This isn't true nor is it false. On the grand over arching plan for the universe all things are connected in the scheme of your life though very few things that happen are really about us. Just like we have bit players that appear in our lives and then disappear never to be seen again. We are the bit players in others lives.

The world doesn't revolve around us. Not every event is about us. Stop letting small issues accumulate and build up accept that more often then not each of those events is a separate non inter-connected event (in the scheme of your life at least)

There is an old story about monks

Two monks were on a pilgrimage. One day, they came to a deep river. At the edge of the river, a young woman sat weeping, because she was afraid to cross the river without help. She begged the two monks to help her. The younger monk turned his back. The members of their order were forbidden to touch a woman.

But the older monk picked up the woman without a word and carried her across the river. He put her down on the far side and continued his journey. The younger monk came after him, scolding him and berating him for breaking his vows. He went on this way for a long time.

Finally, at the end of the day the older monk turned to the younger one. "I only carried her across the river. You have been carrying her all day."


Each issue is like the woman at the river. Be like the old monk and not the young one.

HOMO SUM HUMANI A ME NIHIL ALIENUM PUTO
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Katie (StormyKat) replied the topic: Re:Staying Peaceful in an Angry World

Brandon,

I haven't read all the comments in here yet, but I thought I would toss my two cents in. I have been working on mindfulness since early this year at the suggestion of my psychologist. It has helped immensely with the stress and depression and even some of the awkward family situations that come with family get togethers. I work a customer service job at a veterinarians office. Most of my clients are great, but sometimes they get a little emotional over a sick cat or a bill they can't afford or something like that. Of course they direct that anger and frustration at the front desk staff. Even while I realize that don't hold me personally responsible (most of the time) and that it is just the emotions that come with facing a scary situation like losing your beloved pet, the anger still gets to me. My doctor's suggestion was to try to be mindful of the moment. She suggested focusing simply on my breathing, my typing, or the feel of the phone against my ear. She also suggested mindfully eating. So I find myself, when things get super crazy and I want to explode at someone, mindfully eating one small square of chocolate between calls or clients. I feel the food in my mouth, the way my teeth crunch against it. I taste it. I think about the taste. I notice how it feels to eat that piece of chocolate. If I can't do that, I try to focus on whatever my task at hand is, even if I can't notice all the details I take a deep breath to clear my head and think "ok, this is where I am right now. This moment. Not five minutes from now, right now." It helps clear out some of the negativity and stress. Also, try to have non-judgemental thoughts. Don't make anything good or bad, just describe how it is.

I would also focus on what Jax said about energy. Kol and Jax brought that up to me a few weeks ago and I have noticed it making a difference. It takes a lot of work, and sometimes I don't get it right away. Sometimes its not till five minutes after the crazy person walks out the door that I realize I was sucking up their crazy energy, but even then just realizing that is not my energy helps. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk about anything I said!
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Kol Drake replied the topic: Re:Staying Peaceful in an Angry World

'... sucking up their crazy energy...'

That is when you need to have a 'rock' handy that you can touch and redirect all the 'crazy' to the stone. You can always take it in to the sink and 'wash the crazy away' during a moment/break.

And ya, with that kind of job, I'd normally say -- use a bowling ball -- it's big enough to handle the load. But then, someone might wonder why you are walking around with a bowling ball all the time.

Then again, maybe a rock is not right either -- the impulse to 'give back the crazy' by a more direct method -- throwing the rock at the 'crazy' source might be too tempting. And as we all know -- temptation leads to something something and then something something happens and boom.... we are close to the dark side.
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Katie (StormyKat) replied the topic: Staying Peaceful in an Angry World

Well in my job one thing that helps get rid of the crazy, or the stress or whatever is petting cats. Its nice to have furry critters around to give off some good vibes when you need them. :cheer:
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