StormyKat's Training Journal

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Jax replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

What a relief to have one troublemaker gone!

It's frustrating when people use differences to excuse poor behavior. I'm on the spectrum. Yes I can be an asshole at times. But it doesn't mean that I get a free pass. Ultimately, it might be time for the bosses to send her packing too. You don't need every customer, and setting boundaries will help the business grow!

Until then, hang in there. You are doing a great job. You definitely have learned a lot over the years.
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Katie (StormyKat) replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

Perhaps one day I will stop being amazed at the ways of the Force. Today is not that day.

I have been taking a social media fast for mental health reasons and to get myself back in the swing of things. No Twitter, no Facebook. I logged on to Facebook the other day just to check on the status of my kickboxing class-they are announcing when you can sign up for classes on Facebook. As I was trying to check the most recent updates from them, I somehow stumbled on a Facebook post from a Jedi friend I met at the 2016 Jedi gathering. She was going through a rough friend breakup. I read her post and it reminded me of a few situations I went through. I was reminded of some great advice I got in the forums here and passed it on to her. She said it will be really helpful for her. We then got to talking about life and friends and stuff. We have so many of the same insecurities and life difficulties. It was so helpful and reassuring to me to know that other people struggle with the same social situations that I do. It was especially helpful since I am feeling super insecure and lonely right now. So, I am sitting here feeling better for having helped and unexpectedly being helped in return. Because the Force truly does work in mysterious ways.
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Katie (StormyKat) replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

Y'all my very essence is tired. Work has been a monster this week- lots of upsetting and challenging things happened this week. Lots of changes in store as well. There is a whole ton of negativity and exhaustion running rampant at work. The energy there is just awful. We are all spent.

In addition to a very rough work week at work, it has been a challenging week at home. My parents are out of town until April. The cats and I are getting adjusted to this. They are having a very hard time with the adjusted food schedule. I am having a very hard time with them actually caring that I exist. Not to mention the other things I have to do that I don't normally worry about-cleaning, all the cooking, etc. Plus there is a tom cat coming around marking everything outside, including the back windows, making my house smell of cat pee (unneutered male cat pee to be exact, which is extra pungent).

AND on top of all this I am trying to get myself ready for my blogging conference next month. So much prep for that. So much that I don't even know I haven't done yet. Struggling to find the time and energy to work on blog research, blog topics and reading up on everything I need to know for my conference.

I came home today and my stress levels were just awful. I was hungry, the cats were hungry and swarming. I was tired, there was so much to clean up since I neglected everything last night when I got home from work. I am behind in just about every conceivable area of life (including my tv shows). And I get to get up and do it all again tomorrow at work-another super long, busy, stressful day. And I just leaned into it. I took that stress and went crazy. I could have sat down in bed and passed out right at 8pm when I was done with my dinner. Instead I did chores around the house, I updated my Linkd'In profile. I balanced my budget. I did lots of stuff. I don't know how I feel about this. Initially I was going to lament my inability to relax and let go. My difficulty in caring for myself is constant and, I feel, a big hurdle in my path as a Jedi (because I can't get past the need to be busy all the time). I was going to ask if other Jedi have the same issues. Now however, I feel like I actually did ok by myself. I am going to be tired tomorrow for sure. But I have a head start on a bunch of things (some of which will no doubt have to be redone. My Linkdin profile---writing that after a 12 hour work day is not the most effective).

I think it is time to take my overtired butt downstairs to medicate the cat and put the towels in the dryer then go to bed.
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Kol Drake replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

The house always got an extra 'hard' cleansing when I was pissed for some reason. Pots shined, spots rubbed smooth... many dishes were in peril of being cleaned to death. Heck, I once vacuum'ed the ceiling once in a cabin.. it was nearly black from the small, old gas heater. I mean.. Who vacuums ceilings?!?!?!

?????
I thought "the problem person" left and that took the dread out of the workplace? Or is it now -- one person short so we are all having to do twice the hustling to get it all done?
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Kol Drake replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

Stupid computer.. this was a double entry... sorry.
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Katie (StormyKat) replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

The problem person left. The nurses have been short staffed for months because there are no certified staff (who wants a job you can’t make money at?). One of my coworkers is leaving to start her own business and our manager is also leaving (which has potential to be very good or very bad). We also have had a lot of sick cats and emotional situations like that. So we are all burnt out and underpaid and the stress is really getting to everyone.

Then there are the things I am trying to do in my life beyond work and tending the house. All in all, my stress fed into anxiety making me rather manic last night and this morning. My body was exhausted but my mind wouldn’t let me go to sleep. It was bad.
Grateful for some minor grounding when I stepped outside to feed cats this am. Tomorrow is off, with a shamanic training in the afternoon. So good chances to get myself reset.
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