StormyKat's Training Journal

  • Katie (StormyKat)
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Katie (StormyKat) replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

Also, there was this fortuitously timed comic:

zenpencils.com/comic/161-shonda-rhimes-a-screenwriters-advice/
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Jax replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

It's true, but don't think the dreaming isn't important. We get the energy moving in the dream, and then turn that energy into action. Both are required. :-)
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Kol Drake replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

Just as Jax says... dreaming is not bad in and of itself.
It is when ALL you do is dream and never DO... that is when the disconnect happens.

And, what came to my mind while going over the cartoon --

For some reason scientific discoveries came to mind.
Not the ones built from tiny bits built upon another but the ones where -- while investigating and delving into some 'thing' -- something else entirely unexpected comes about that turns into a big deal.

Or the fellow that was trying to figure out the molecular structure of benzene and had a dream about a snake biting it's own tail... which turned out to be the benzene 'ring'. Ya, he was doing he work and researching the heck out of stuff but his 'dream' (unconscious / subconscious) helped him put pieces together he wasn't even considering consciously.

Okay... those are two different 'kinds' of dreams and not the 'lay in the grass and DREAM BIG' kind of dreams... but, you DO have to pick a direction and then -- like Jax also said -- take action.
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Jax replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

They may be different types of dreams, but it still relates. Typically when people try to squash dreamers, they don't realize the importance of that down time. Breakthroughs come from letting the subconscious and/or superconscious stew over something. Then it comes to the surface for the cognitive mind. But it can't come through if you're always 'work work work'. This is true of writing, the example in the cartoon, just as it is of science or any pursuit. Forcing everything to come from and through the cognitive mind is inefficient and creates lesser results. It's all a matter of balance. Though, this cartoon seems to be referring to people who only dream, which also creates the results in the end of them never doing anything in their life. Their dreams aren't to create but to distract from living. Those cease to be beneficial then.

Hopefully this gives Stormykat a little inspiration. :-)
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Katie (StormyKat) replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

Yes. I seem to be one of the people who always dreams and never works. I am always waiting for "one day." One Day I will be a writer. One day I will find balance. One day I will travel. One day I will have a place of my own, etc. In those days when my dreams came crashing down after college I kinda lost my way and was always saying "one day" while I struggled with my demons and procrastinated because I was scared. While I was waiting for "one day" I held on to those inspirational dreamer type quotes and said "one day!" Yeah, "one day" ain't gonna happen if I don't sit down and write.

Also, I can't say how many t imes my nightly dreams have been amazing material f or stories. Yet, despite trying to write them down and save the dreams I can never seem to get them down on paper to write. If I could record my dreams...yeah, that would be nice!
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Kol Drake replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

Pen/pencil and pad next to the bed so you can record it immediately.

OR... a tape recorder so you can transcribe it later.

AND... "one day" can come true if you start taking action to -- ahem -- "Make it so."
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  • Katie (StormyKat)
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Katie (StormyKat) replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

I am a bit behind on my yoga journal, but better late than never.

Last week-two weeks ago?-- September 19th--I did two yoga classes in one day. It was my first experience with active yoga I did Hatha and something called Yin. Yin is a very passive yoga that is probably closer to a gentle yoga than Hatha. The description on the website says Yin is:

This is a more passive, slower-paced style of yoga. The practice has a meditative and calming effect, in that poses are held for longer periods of time in order to slowly stretch the deep connective tissue in the body. Yin Yoga specifically targets the ligaments and tendons in joints, helping to improve range of motion and flexibility. Yin Yoga is a unique type of yoga making it suitable for ALL LEVELS, including beginners and experienced practitioners. It is a healing experience for mind and body.


I was not ready for Hatha! Simply not ready. I pushed my body and I felt good after the class. I sweated up a storm and got my heart working. I could feel muscles moving and stretching. Downward dog and Plank are killer for me, I could feel my abdominal muscles yelling at me. I figured it was simply because my abdominal muscles are super weak. Well I may have actually done some damage to them. I woke up the next morning and it hurt to move. I couldn't sit up without rolling around a little bit and using upper abdominal muscles. Which was very inconvenient because I finally had my Intro to Yoga class on Saturday.

That's right, three yoga classes in two days. I liked the intro class, but feel I probably didn't get as much out of it as I would have liked since my abdominal muscles felt like they were ripping every time I did plank or downward dog. I am very excited to take the class again the next time I have a Saturday off. I skipped my Sunday gentle yoga that week because I was sore and I wanted to spend the time with my cousin.

This week I went to vinyasa yoga on Wednesday night. My abdomen still hurt, which makes me think that I did actually do some damage to my muscles. I missed my gentle yoga class this week, I was at a baby shower and I didn't leave the shower in time to make it to my class. I am really sad about missing my class, I had been looking forward to letting go of the week's stress and thoughts.

I am not as fond of vinyasa as I am of Hatha. My body is not comfortable doing the vinyasa poses--going from downward dog to plank to laying flat on the mat..I am not skilled enough yet and overall didn't feel as comfortable with the class. Which is ironic because the vinyasa 1 class was the one class I was in with the most mixed levels of students. I just wasn't feeling that class and those sets of poses. It didn't feel good to me-mentally or physically.

Hatha is a bit of a blur at this point, but I remember liking it (other than the difficulty doing downward dog and plan pose). I still think my favorite class is the gentle yoga and I hope to continue taking it. Now that my Group-on is expired (without me taking all 10 of my classes :( ) I will have to do some financial planning to actually keep going to yoga classes. It will take a bit more to keep me going to because it will be a minus for my pocket book, which is something I am really trying to watch right now.
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Jax replied the topic: Re:StormyKat's Training Journal

It often takes 3-4 days for muscles worked that hard to recover. Remember every pose is optional. Ease out before going that far so you can ease into it without injury. Ask for modifications too.

I like vinyasa but you will need modifications for a while. Just ask in the moment or talk to the instructor before class. :-)


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk - Please forgive typos
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Katie (StormyKat) replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

It has been a rough day emotionally.

I had absolutely no desire to to get out of bed today. It was cold, dark and rainy and I was tired. So I dawdled around the house. I also dawdled because this is the week where the "opener" at work is the person who is usually late. I refuse to spend another week being both opener and closer. So I dawdled to waste more time before I got to work. When the day did start it was atrocious. There were easily half dozen people in the lobby and my co-worker was getting yelled at by one. There was just so much going on, so many people and apparently a lot of negative energy. I didn't feel well either, lots of pain in the midsection.

A bit later one of my co-workers announced to us that she was having hip replacement surgery after all. There has been debate since August whether she would be having surgery or not. She is having surgery in a little over a month, and will be out of work for the rest of the year. Which means people aren't going to get their time off at the holidays. I also feel it means I have to put my medical work off because *if* I need surgery I won't be able to take the time off this year, and I want to get all the tests and any other work done in the same year so I can hopefully meet my insurance deductible and have my insurance pay some of the medical costs (stupid American health care system). I in turn feel horribly guilty, because I will most likely get my time off request for right around Christmas. If I get time off, then someone else won't get time off, which means s/he won't be able to go home for the holidays. I also know that if I don't take the time off, I am going to be resentful, which doesn't work either.

When I heard about my co-worker's surgery I was thrown into a tizzy because of everything that it means. I then wanted to run from the office, hide in a corner and cry. Not entirely sure why. A few other things happened that turned the morning into quite an affair. I was so absorbed in negative energy. I wanted to cry and scream at people. I knew I was being short but didn't realize I was being quite as short as I was until one of my co-workers made a comment to me about me being "frantic" or something like that and how it was stressing her out. I wanted to yell at her that she was stressing me out (which she was. Somehow she stresses me out lately). I tried to let it go a little more, tried to be mindful of my thoughts and actions, take deep breaths and feel the energy. None of that quite did it all for me though. I thought of Kol's trick of putting your negative energy into a rock and wished I had a rock. I didn't have a rock, but I may have put my negative energy into the computer mouse or I may have put the energy into the orchid near by. Or perhaps I just put it back into the environment. Wherever I put it, I got it out of me and suddenly felt much lighter.

I was still feeling down later. A walk and lunch seemed to get rid of my abdominal pain, and I tried out my new "happy light" at lunch. I have Seasonal Affective Disorder, which means I get depressed in the winter (which makes it great to live in Chicago). I have a light that gives off a certain spectrum of UV light to mimic the sun's rays. I found this nifty thing that uses the same technology but in ear buds, and shines the light through your ears to the proper nerves. I tried it out today and it helped. For the rest of my work day I felt "normal" not depressed, not angry, not like I wanted to scream. It was good.

When I came home I completely lost it though. I spent half an hour just lying on my bed doing nothing. I was trying to talk to my mom about my medical stuff and time off at work and feeling guilty if I get the time off. She told me I was getting way too worked up about things. As I am shaking my hands and talking a million miles a minute about all the issues with my medical and insurance. Then she told me to stop feeling guilty about the holiday time off. I said I can't just stop feeling guilty. She asked why, I said I don't know that's why I spend hundreds of dollars a month of mental health care. i then ran out of the room and started crying hysterically. Because I know why I can't stop feeling guilty. Because I don't feel like I am worthwhile. I feel like I am nothing, or lesser than others. Which logically I know is not true. It is a believe I have had for so long though it is really hard to shake. Especially when the depression comes back. I then cried hysterically for some amount of time. I feel restless, useless and pointless. I feel like I have no meaning to my life right now.

I was so proud of my energy awareness earlier, and now I just feel like a nothing. A useless waste of space. It is really hard to fight this stuff off.
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  • Katie (StormyKat)
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Katie (StormyKat) replied the topic: StormyKat's Training Journal

New day, new strength. A good night's sleep and a bright sunny day were of great assistance to me, as was just airing my thoughts/fears. I feel much better today, much more like myself.

Got some stuff done this morning, working on writing now. Or I was. I keep getting distracted. Writing feels good though.

I think I am going to try another yoga class today. It has been over a week since I have done any yoga and my body is starting to complain. I notice my back, where I have a bulging disc and apparently a lot of tension, is tight again. My shoulders are hunching forward as well. I just need some good stretching. Plus it helps get me out of my house and out of my head for a little bit. Maybe even will inspire some more creativity.

Now it is time to work on Creed 101 homework, and maybe some homework from my doctor. :huh:
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